In The Silence

We sat at the large oak dining table. Colorful, translucent beads, separated into bowls, spread across the glossy surface. Grandma picked an amber one with a long needle, followed by a tiny gold, then back for another amber. Her red-rose lips moved as she silently counted.

I watched her, my 8 year-old feet swinging back-and-forth because they still didn’t touch the ground from the high-backed chair. Once again, I’d lost the number of beads I’d collected and had to start over. We were working on some kind of decoration that looked like tiny chandeliers but had no other name than “purty” for it. Grandma, who loved knitting, crocheting and making little things had them hanging all over her house.

That day, she’d invited me to join her.

The silence between us stretched on like the nylon string connecting the beads together. Once I opened my mouth to say something, then stopped, the words halting in my throat like they couldn’t stand to interrupt the quietness. I threaded more blue beads. I liked blue, it reminded me of the sky and being outdoors and running. My heels bumped the chair legs.

Another thought entered my head and dared to escape my lips, but again halted. I couldn’t get my mouth to speak. Eventually, I gave up. Just being there, with my grandma was enough. She’d look up from her work every once in a while, give me a wink, and then refocused on her hand’s work.

That was enough.

When I go to God, oftentimes I have the same problem. Thoughts, words, wants, needs, desires, demands all come pouring out. Few are the times when I will allow sitting silently in His presence be enough. Yet, it’s in the silence that we can find Him.

The Lord said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

1 Kings 19:11-13

May we find peace in the silent moments and simply enjoy His quiet presence.